It’s difficult to put the entire 2018 Chicago Marathon experience into words…

The day dawned chilly and rainy - not exactly ideal running conditions for a short run, let alone 26.2 miles. I was hoping and praying that the rain wouldn’t fall during the run, but the first 8 miles were a wet mess. Luckily, the rain did finally let-up after that.

I started that morning jazzed and ready to own the marathon. I trained. I did more long runs this time around than I did for either of the other two marathons I’ve run. I did more diverse runs - sprint work, hills, etc.. - than I did for the others. I more or less followed a training program that was bound to work. All summer long I was running some of my fastest miles - proving that determination and training do work.

But, somehow, it feels like that fell apart when the rain started to fall that morning. I made the last-minute decision to switch my shoes to a lighter pair but ones I hadn’t done any long runs in. I’m still not sure if that was a good decision or not. When wet, they certainly weighed less than the ones I planned to wear, but my feet weren’t used to those shoes and long runs.

 

By the time I hit mile 13 (which my running app actually said was 14 miles with all the weaving I was doing) I knew my goal of running the entire marathon under 4:30 wasn’t going to happen. My legs and glutes were beginning to hurt from the constant motion of picking up water-soaked shoes. My running skirt, shirt, sports bra, etc… were soaked from running in the rain. Everything felt heavier, because everything was.

When I hit mile 22 I knew this wouldn’t be my fastest marathon either. To PR I needed to run in less than 4:48, but the struggle was real. I re-aligned my goals based on the fact that the weather was hindering the experience. Instead of shooting for a PR, I focused on beating my slowest time and being the first to cross the finish line in my immediate family. Both of those I managed to accomplish.

I won’t lie, I’m disappointed that this marathon wasn’t what I had in mind. It wasn’t the weather I hoped for and it wasn’t the time I wanted. But…

The whole thing reminded me how so much of life is like training and running a marathon. There are things in life you can control and things you can’t. There are unexpected road blocks and choices you make that determine future events. And all of it requires a whole lot of physical and mental strength. You need to know when to muscle through and when to pull back. You need to know when you are being lazy and when you’ve hit your limits.

And you need to do it with others! Making it through the marathon, just as making it through life, alone isn’t really an option. You need the people cheering you on, and the volunteers at the aid stations, and the strangers shouting running mantras, and the guy willing to give you a hot of Fireball as you run by or a swig of champagne (yes, there were both of those options along the course). You need the people offering emotional support, and the moments of joy that a simple funny poster can offer. (Shout to my fellow Aaptiv user who stood in the rain just to cheer us on at mile 13.)

And you need fellow runners who inspire you to keep going. This marathon I ran with my sister, dad and cousin as a way to raise money and awareness for Scleroderma research. This autoimmune disease, which my sister has, turns people into stone, making it impossible for them to do things like run a marathon. And before the disease continued to progress, my sister Emily, wanted to do this one last time. We didn’t run together, but along the way I kept tracking her progress (yeah, I was that person with a phone out while running) and I kept thinking to myself : You can keep going because while you want to quit, your body isn’t literally making it impossible for you to do this in a year or two. Her’s is. In 4 years, when she’s my age, she won’t be able to run a marathon while cursing the rain that isn’t allowing her to PR. She won’t be able to spend 26.2 miles wondering if the last-minute shoe change was hindering her ability to hit her marathon goals.

So, in a way, the slower time, the horrible weather, the shoes that were killing my feet by mile 22, were all a reminder of exactly why I was doing this. I didn’t sign up for the 2018 Chicago Marathon to PR. I didn’t sign up to prove something about my self and my personal fitness. Heck, I didn’t even sign up to beat everyone else. I signed up to run this for my sister and to support her as she battles her illness. Each day she battles a marathon of her own, so I can make it through one day of challenging circumstances and give that to her. This run wasn’t about me. It was about her - and she kicked ass.