At various stages in life, a move can be a wonderful thing. Heck, since college I have moved to New York, Boston, St. Louis, Milwaukee and Chicago. Whether you’re a young adult going away to college, a fresh graduate heading halfway across the country to kick off your career, or at some other stage of life—moving for love or work or simply a much needed change of scenery—relocating to a new place offers loads of excitement and promise. However, as much as a move often involves moving towards newness and opportunity, it’s also a move away from plenty that you hold dear: familiar sights and sounds, favorite restaurants, friends, and most importantly, family.
Trust me, I know it can be a bitter pill to swallow, leaving parents and siblings behind. Whether you see them every day or every week, you know you can come to them any time you want to celebrate your joys or mourn your sorrows. No longer once you’ve moved. How will you cope? How will you stay close without the frequent contact?
How To Navigate a Move and Still Feel Close to Family:
1. Let them know about the move well in advance. This one might seem obvious, but it can be easy to dread difficult conversations with our loved ones, and the longer we wait, the harder having those conversations get. Start talking about it. Air out your feelings with them, and let them air out their own feelings. This will allow you and your family to best enjoy the time together you have left before the move and begin preparing for life apart.
2. Schedule times to talk over the phone. Whether you’re moving for school, work, or any other reason, getting settled in will keep you pretty busy. And of course, your family has their own responsibilities keeping them busy as well. In those early days after your move, you might want to set up a schedule when you’ll be able to speak with your family over the phone. Having those calls on the calendar will set your mind at ease, since you’ll know that, regardless of busy schedules on both sides, you’ll have that time each week to connect with those you love.
3. Use everything technology offers. Phone calls aren’t the only way to say in touch. Texting with your family members will help you feel connected throughout the day. Post pictures of your new home and city on Instagram or Facebook for them to see and comment on. If they (mainly your parents) aren’t into social media, email photos to them regularly. Video chat when you can for a connection that more intimate than phone calls. Alternatively, going old school and writing letters to them is a nice way to stay connected while giving them something tangible they can hold onto.
4. Plan out visits. Your family will want to visit at some point. Probably sooner rather than later. Those first visits are especially important, as you’ll feel most lonely in the early going. So, plan them out before your move. If you do start feeling lonely and this gets you down, you’ll have those visits on the calendar to look forward to.
5. Get involved locally. While it’s natural to miss your family, you moved away for yourself and your life. Don’t let your feelings about your family prevent you from getting out there and making new friends. Go out with your co-workers. Join a softball team or a local club. Whatever helps you get involved and meet people, do it. It will give you something to share with your family when you talk over the phone, and it will reduce your pangs of loneliness.
6. Remember that your family misses you, too. Just as you’re lonely for your family, they’re lonely for you. Don’t call only when you need them, but remember that they need you as well. And don’t forget their special occasions. Have special treats sent to your mom for her birthday, surprise your sister with flowers for her graduation, and so on.
It can be tough moving away from your family. But it can also be a time of great excitement and adventure. So, enjoy it. If you follow our tips above, we think you’ll able to keep your family members close even if they’re thousands of miles away.
